One of the reasons why I wanted to start this blog was for me to be able to jot down all my thoughts – because I have too many – and try to wrap my mind around, well, my mind!
This picture is from my internship notebook because I thought of this and immediately, I had to write it down or else it would escape me – as (unfortunately) many of my thoughts do. Gone with the wind like my title, old friendships.
My handwriting isn’t the best – but have no fear because I’ve got it typed up! I actually changed “more” to “most” and removed “is”.
Sometimes, the time you learn most about friendship is when you lose one. What follows is that you constantly think about it when you know it’s not coming back.
I’m human, I’m a college student, I’m in my early twenties, and I’m bound to lose friends. Friendship, like love, doesn’t always last forever but that doesn’t mean it was a bad relationship. Old friendships have taught me a lot about myself more than having sour leftover feelings about someone.
A lot of times, I’ll admit, it was me who was the bad friend or the one who triggered the ending. It has been my fault or it has been me who left the friendship. Sometimes, it was because I felt the end of a friendship coming soon like a storm that had finally darkened the sky. The other times, it would be me who realized I was the hidden poison in their apple. I didn’t know I was the snake in the grass until I finally was able to hear the hissing sounds coming from my own self. No one ever thinks they’re the serpent.
In life, all I ever want to be is wise and full of experience. Not having certain people in my life has taught me to value the current friends that I do have. Not being able to hang out with certain people (that I think of fondly sometimes) has taught me how to be a better friend. Not being friends anymore with certain people has taught me that if I want good friends, I have to be a good friend myself.
Because of the past friendships that I have lost, I have learned to take friendships quite seriously now. And for that, I thank the people who crossed paths with me, shared laughs and tears with me, and was simply there for me when I needed it, so genuinely, I thank you for being my friend. Even if we don’t speak anymore, know that I wish you the best and nothing but the best.